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I seem to have gotten this to work just fine after much tweaking of various settings on my webhost.
Have a look at the actual email headers of the rejected email. Are the email server name and ip address the same as your website's domain name and ip address? If they are not, then you should start by including the actual sending SMTP server in your SPF record.
My SPF record looks like this: "v=spf1 +mx +a +ip4:99.99.99.99 a:myactual.sendinghost.com ~all". The "ip4:" entry is the actual sending servers IP and the "a:" entry is the actual sending servers host.domainname as shown in the headers.
This article from Google was very helpful for troubleshooting/understanding the DMARC setup process. Key is are you telling @gmail.com servers to Reject your mail on DMARC failure or saying None.
Install the Easy WP SMTP plugin and setup it up. This simple step can straighten out alot of issues.
I have had success with ATT and others with requesting for my email server to be removed from their rejection list for abuse.
Finally, many inbound email servers use scanning tools to look for possible UCE/Spam signatures, such as trackback links and such. They also look for good email newsletter signatures in those same emails so that a good actor/senders emails can come on in. Be sure to setup your Settings-> Company Info, with a legitimate name and address. Make sure that your Newsletter DOES include the "Manage your subscription | View online" links near the bottom. The inbound SMTP servers at Gmail are looking for good form that meets the requirements.
Best of luck!
